Why Yes, I Love Being a Tomorrow Bot

August 3rd, 2010 Posted in Rants

Hi, I’m Clark Cable. You may remember me from such films as Run Silent, Run in Sleep Mode and the more famous Gone With the Windows. Or maybe not, since that was the future a long time ago and a lot has happened since then, such as yours truly getting super-modified to save the world. Dr. Atomica was insane to just grab the nearest set of robots, retrofit them with weapons and then send them into the past to save the future. I’m an ACTOR BOT for cog’s sake. I was working on the movie BoomKlang with Dispenser Tracy at the time and the worst thing I had to worry about was what industrial strength solvent to use to polish my chromatic smile.

I was never designed for this sort of hero tomfoolery and neither were the rest of the Tomorrow Bots: A paperboy, vending machine, telephone operator and medieval tour guide to name a few! Seriously??? Rescue this, rescue that, fight crime, defeat the Slimeacles*, lock up the bad guys. We have to save the world, only to save it again the next day. It all gets rather dull, and I’d say if it takes this much work to keep the world from being destroyed, then maybe the gosh darn** thing just wasn’t meant to be. This is a part that even the great Clark Cable finds difficult to play.

* Horrible things born from the primordial ooze billions of year ago in Earth’s past. Don’t ask me how they learned time travel!

** My apologies. My curse inhibitor translates ineffectual replacements. The fudging thing practically ruined Gone With The Windows.



3 Comments

  1. Yomama says:

    At least you HAVE a curse inhibitor, which is more than can be said for some…

    • ClarkCable says:

      Ah yes, it has saved me from some embarrassment at times, like the orphan charity event when a child kicked me in the generator and I yelled out at the top of my iron lungs REFRIGERATOR! But then there was the time I was re-enacting a scene from Gone With The Windows and I said, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a drum.” At which point some wise-ascot drummer with the band did a rim shot.

  2. Yomama says:

    I’m sure your Mombot is SO proud.

Leave a Reply